I want to cry, I want to scream, I want to tell you mostly,
I hate that I'm so afraid of everything.
I hate that you’re the one thing I want the most but can't have.
I hate that you let me go before I even got to say goodbye.
I wish that you would come back to me.
I wish I were strong enough to say no to you.
I wish I could believe my own lies I use to cover up the pain you left.
I need to move on says my head, I need to hold on says my heart.
I need to decide says my mind, but I just can't.
I envy the way this hasn’t hurt you at all, not a tiny bit.
I envy her, ALOT, do u know that?
I envy the fact you don’t understand what this feels like at all.
I want to hurt you, I want to be with you.
I want this nightmare to be over.
I wish I could make things they were before you came along.
I wish I could change time, I wish I could change you.
I wish I could have hurt you before you hurt me.
I wish I would have given you the letter when I wanted.
I need you out of my thoughts, I need you out of my heart
I need to start doing the right things for me.
I hate that you used me, I hate that I wasted it with you.
I hate that I gave you something I can never have back.
I'm tired of hoping aimlessly for you,
I'm tired of wanting something I can't have,
I'm tired of hurting myself for things that aren’t my fault.
I'm sorry I wasn't good enough, I guess.
I'm sorry I defended you when everyone else was right.
I'm sorry I couldn’t make you any happier.
Funny though how you never once said sorry for hurting me,
For breaking me, for not loving me, anymore.
